Bits & Pieces
Articles with unfiltered opinions
Bits & Pieces
Articles with unfiltered opinions
Good Sex, Good Life
If you know anything about Canadians, it’s that most of them are pretty damn nice. That goes double for Nova Scotia girls, who are cute, fun and can drink a Russian submarine commander under the table.Obviously you can’t generalize, but suffice...
“Maus” Trap
“Orwellian” is putting it mildly. In January a Tennessee school board banned a Pulitzer Prize-winning book from its libraries. What pernicious tome could have provoked such an extreme course of action? A manual for constructing homemade pipe...
Stupid Sexy Candy
Unbelievable as it may seem, Tucker Carlson losing his mind over the de-yassification of brown and green M&Ms is probably the least interesting thing about this story. You may recall that in January, as the world stood at the brink of war, a...
The Joy of Cucking
Cuck is an ugly word made uglier by the ugly people who use it to make themselves feel less ugly inside. But words only have power when we give them power, which is why it is high time to collectively call bullshit on the hate and let yourself enjoy...
Way 2 Spicy
Did you hear the one about the Instagram model who tried to “trap” Drake, only to end up with a shot of hot sauce up her coochie? Truly, we live in the golden age of celebrity news. In a blog interview, claims she hooked up with Drizzy for some...
The Rule of 3s
Nothing warms our cockles here at HUSTLER quite like a loving couple who have transcended the shackles of sexual jealousy and want to help others do the same. So what’s the secret to a loving relationship built on trust? More threesomes. Yes, you...
Virtually Fuckable
Maybe it’s the cumulative effect of starring in four Matrix movies, but Keanu Reeves has some very strong opinions when it comes to virtual sex with celebrities. Well, “strong” may be a bit over the top, but let’s just say that Neo is...
Talk Dirty to Me
The naughty minxes of Cosmo are at it again, doling out sex-positive advice for lovers looking to spice things up in the bedroom or wherever their readers are doing it these days (insert anal sex joke here). We’re all about that nasty patter, so...
The Year of the Cougar
Ice is cold. Sugar is sweet. And women over 40 are indeed hot. As truisms go, these hardly bear repeating. What does merit discussion, however, is the persistent sense of numbskull wonderment when it comes to mature beauty. Case in point:...
The Orgy Is On!
How can you not adore and admire New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern? The affable and utterly competent leader is a beacon of integrity on the world stage and helped navigate her country out of the COVID hellscape that is currently ravaging...
April Fools
Spring has sprung, and that can only mean one thing: The prankening is upon us! April Fools’ Day antics are a time-honored tradition and welcome distraction from COVID and its never-ending parade of variants. Our social interactions have become so...
A Real Dick Move
In the comedy classic Anchorman (2004), Ron Burgundy (Will Ferrell) returns home after a party only to find out that his faithful dog, Baxter, has eaten an entire wheel of cheese. “How’d you do that?” he asked, astonished by this feat....
A Lover & a Fighter
If Mike Tyson’s chauffeur claims the Baddest Man on the Planet said he might have murdered his opponent had he not fucked right before a fight, then we believe him. The champ clearly speaks from experience, and he’s certainly not the first...
Flight of Fancy
Million-dollar-idea alert! For the bargain basement price of a paltry $1,000, you can join the coveted Mile High Club without the foul toilet stench or risk of being put on a no-fly list—or worse. In a way, we’re jealous we didn’t think of it...
Gray? Well, Okay!!!
Like the swallows returning to Capistrano, entertainment media is hardwired to recycle the “older men are sexy” trope at least once a year. And you know what? We’re not complaining. Bring on the celebrity DILFs! If there’s any room for...
The Joys of Period Sex
From the department of soul-crushing statistics, this eye-roller of a fact: According to The Sun UK, “Nearly half of women who have sex on their period say it gives them a heightened sense of pleasure but have been shamed for suggesting...
Stupid Sexy Ketchup!
The horror…the horror. Of sexy ketchup. Every person has their line in the sand. For Adrian Shann of Hull (U.K.), that line was crossed when a Pizza Hut turned condiments into pornography. I mean, how else was he to interpret a bottle of ketchup...
Save Our Sand
Tourists are the worst. Economically they’re a necessary evil, but there are limits—and Spain is drawing the line at habitat destruction by way of wanton public fornication. It’s called “cruiser trampling” and threatens to destroy a...
High-Heeled Hooey
Have foot fetishists infiltrated academia? Far be it for us to cast aspersions, but it’s hard not to be skeptical of a university study that claims high-heeled shoes are a woman’s ticket to bigger Os and a superhuman pelvic floor. Obviously, a...
A Very HUSTLER Valentine’s Day
Love it or hate it, Valentine’s Day is Christmas for romantics. And while everyone is entitled to their kicks, the tired cliches of this annual schmaltz-fest can get tedious real fast. If overpriced restaurants, roses and gas...
Kiarra Kai Update
Remember Kiarra Kai, the free spirit from our July 2021 issue (“Models Without Borders”) who gave up her L.A. apartment, bought a short bus and is living her best life as a sexy, fearless nomad? She’s still at it, driving all across this...
Tears of a Clown
It doesn’t feel like so long ago when we once collectively scoffed at the existence of men’s rights. To quote Leslie Knope, the stalwart bureaucrat of NBC’s Parks and Recreation, “Men’s rights is nothing.” Well, what was once a petty...
