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August 2020

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Deal or No Deal

Everyone has their own hang-ups and hard lines when it comes to adultery, but at the end of the day cheating isn’t a crime, and this is still a free country, right? Right? And it’s only once we get past our own preconceptions that we can begin...

Scent of a Woman

In a perfect world, we learn that Gwyneth Paltrow and her putrid Goop products are charged withmurder by boredom and she’s locked up in a Turkish septic tank for the rest of her life. Butuntil then we just have to keep on hating her and all her...

Orgasm Stacking

There’s this weird intersection in humanity where people who are working themselves to an early grave are also trying to embrace a New Age lifestyle. Futile? Hey, at least they’re trying. And you have to give them credit for any attempt to...

Big Love, Small Package

In this age of fake news and Russian Twitter bots, one would certainly be forgiven for casting doubt on this totally legitimate news story. So please, try to keep an open mind as we attempt to explain Dinky One, the new dating site for...

Sign O’ the Times

We here at HUSTLER are fascinated by the sex lives of the British. Under the covers, they’re just so unabashed and raunchy, and yet outwardly everything appears so proper, perhaps due to those years of living under the chaste yolk of a strict...

Porn Goes Viral

If art is society’s mirror, then that goes double for porn in times of calamity. Like clockwork, we are already seeing the emergence of COVID-19-themed porn, and as you may have already guessed, it’s a bit weird. On the one hand, people are...

A Hustler’s Always Prepared

We get it—you’re fed up. All you see and hear is coronavirus this, COVID-19 that, recession, Armageddon, blah blah blah. But this is important, so listen up, because HUSTLER cares about you. To quote the Bard, the readiness...

Virginia Is for Lovers

Every state has their embarrassing legal relics—you know, those antiquated laws that are still somehow on the books today, leaving police to wonder, Am I really supposed to arrest this guy for cheating on his wife? (a felony in...

Kink-Friendly Digs

The modern sharing economy is…complicated. On the one hand, I should be able to do whatever the hell I want with my car or home. On the other hand, the near complete absence of regulation makes it a legit concern for neighbors and women who...

The Art of the Nude Selfie

Sex workers are multitalented, especially when it comes to photography. Face it: Your favorite cam model is not flanked by an army of stylists; she’s doing this all on her own and looking drop-dead sexy in the process. For her,...

Find Your Funny Bone

Giant dinosaurs, gorgeous architecture and a thriving arts scene are just a few of the perks to visiting Palm Springs, arguably California’s best-kept secret. And while this inland gem is often overshadowed by a certain music festival that shall...

China’s Iron Fist Softens

As the world grapples with the prospect of a coronavirus pandemic, we are getting word from deep inside Chinese borders that government officials—in a fit of unbridled benevolence—seem to be easing up restrictions on porn as a way of...

Beaver Fever Hits HUSTLER Hollywood

Colorado isn’t typically known for its warm winters, but it was plenty hot in Colorado Springs on January 31, as HUSTLER Hollywood opened its new store. The reason behind the unseasonably hot temperature? The presence...

(Sensitive) Studs For Hire

You don’t hear as much lore and chatter about male escorts because, let’s face it, most women don’t have to try as hard to get laid. That’s not to say that there is anything wrong with women who choose to pay for sex, the...

When Goat-Napping Goes Wrong

First things first, be assured that this story ends up okay…unless you count one man’s crippling meth addiction. And his even more crippling bad judgment. Or the tattered remains of his friendship with a goat who shall remain...

Practice What You Preach

Okay, it’s no bombshell reveal that the South, with all its finger-wagging and moral hooha, is just as horny as the rest of us, but it’s always worth revisiting this factoid with due regularity, if only to remind the hypocrites that...

First Contact

Secret shame no more! If ever you’ve fantasized about the sweet caress of a Martian digit as it prepares your anal probe, you’re not alone. Like, the opposite of alone…you’re in very good company,  so much so that some...

Boobs Save Koala Bears!

One billion animals dead. Over 12 million acres of land up in flames. The Australia wildfires, still burning at press time, have caused untold destruction and suffering. So when the government was slow to step in, sex workers endeavored to...

You Had Me at Cream Pie

It’s not easy being a McDonald’s franchise owner. Between slumping sales and the imminent transition to a plant-based menu, the brand is struggling to remain relevant in an age where the popularity of colon-clogging death sludge is on...

Sex Doll Protocol

If you pay attention to international news, then you’ll occasionally catch a stark reminder or three of why Canada is not the bucolic Northern paradise you once imagined. Canada can be racist. Canada can be violent. And much like our own law...

Girl Meets Porn

It says a lot about the state of the entertainment industrial complex that an actor on a not-unpopular network TV show can leave mainstream behind to make more money and find greater fulfillment working in adult entertainment. Maitland Ward, you are...

Highs and Lows

You know what they say: Where there’s a will, there’s a way. And in pursuit of the almighty orgasm, you better believe that ingenuity has a way of flourishing in the face of obstacles. Obviously great sex is great because everyone is enjoying...

The Secret Language of Women

“Do you know who tells the truth? Drunks and children.” This all-too-true gem, dispensed by Erika Jayne from The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (Season 9, Episode 20), is undeniably apt—save for one glaring omission: sex...

Make These Words Go Away

Dating is hard enough as it is without having to keep up with the ever-evolving and dignity-crushing lexicon of words that arise out of misguided necessity. Like, did I really need a word to capture the unique humility of someone...