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Friday Funnies: Awfully Wedded

Marriage: Despite the cliché of couples living in wedded bliss, it often marks the end of good times. Once hitched, many spouses begin to wonder if they’ve slipped a ring on their finger or a ball and chain around their ankle. Even so, there are plenty of laughs to be had about the prospect of...

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HUSTLER Classic: Model Behavior

Who among us has not gazed upon a particularly attractive fashion model posing on a billboard, a TV spot or in a magazine ad and thought, Yeah, she looks great in those clothes—but she’d look a lot better out of them? The March ’07 HUSTLER gave readers just such an opportunity with the pictorial “Erika:...

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Love Bites

Looking to sink your teeth into the act of erotic biting? Chew on this… Love hurts, especially when the people we choose to love—regardless of whether it’s for a night, a week or just until something better comes along—insist on biting all over our bodies like they’re gnawing on an old rubber chew toy. We’re...

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Asstastic!

Meet some fantastic XXX performers who you’ll really want to get behind—because the view from back there is incredible! Butts. Rear Ends. Derrières. Booties. No matter what you call them—asses are amazing! And we’re far from alone in that ass-essment; big-booty babes have been one of the most popular categories in porn basically since the...

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Heaven’s Gate, RIP Larry Flynt

Heaven’s Gate, RIP Larry Flynt...

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A Poppin’ Good Time

Looking for a fetish that’s totally blowing up? Welcome to the world of looning. The beauty of adult entertainment is that there is something for everyone to enjoy, from the tame to the extreme to the unconventional. The world of fetishes allows you to explore realms outside of intercourse that stimulate your mind and body...

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HUSTLER Two-Timers: Liv Wild

Welcome back to HUSTLER Two-Timers, where we celebrate Honeys so nice, we’ve featured them twice! Today we’re focusing our attention and affection on Liv Wild, a sultry, exotic brunette from Panama City, Panama, known for its breathtaking attractions like the Panama Canal and the Las Bóvedas waterfront promenade. And, of course, Ms. Wild herself. Liv...

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Friday Funnies: Preaching to the Perverted

Ready for a religious experience that will really elevate your spirit? We’re heading to church for a few good, dirty laughs! Let us pray—that we don’t die laughing while enjoying these uproariously hilarious cartoons. Amen! “But Father Tim, why can’t we tell Jesus that we play those naked games?!” “Every Sunday I’m so tempted to...

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Natasha Malkova

When I was little, I was super girly. I used to have sleepovers, and we’d watch tons of movies and giggle about boys. Well, I guess I never got over being boy crazy, but it turns out, I’m into girls too! It’s been fun exploring my sexuality in real life...

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HUSTLER Classic: A View to a Thrill

There’s nothing like a spontaneous public sex session between two hot blondes—especially when you have a front-row seat for the action. Such was the case with the July ’02 HUSTLER pictorial “Monica & Fawn: Split Decision.” The pictorial, lensed by photographer Matti Klatt, chronicled the exploits of Monica and Fawn, a pair of beauties who...

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Call Me Daddy?

What does it say about a woman if she likes to call her lover by a paternal pet name? And what about the guys who like it? We dive into the complicated issue. It should be considered a dark stain on the fabric of society that couples are required to have cutesy pet names for...

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What Turns Women Off?

Forget farting in bed or belching at the dinner table—here are the things that will really put you in the No-Bone Zone with the ladies… Ask a man to identify the leading complaints straight American women have about their partners, and he might mention burping at the dinner table or farting in bed. However, according...

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HUSTLER Two-Timers: Natasha Malkova

Welcome to HUSTLER Two-Timers, where we celebrate Honeys so nice, we’ve featured them twice! Today we’re focusing our attention and affection on Natasha Malkova, who hails from Sacramento, California. The capital of the Golden State, Sacramento goes by many nicknames—Sactown, Sac, City of Trees, and so on. In this case, City of Trees seems most...

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Amazing Amazons

Thirsting for a tall drink of water? Let us introduce you to some XXX enchantresses you can’t help but look up to. The adult-entertainment industry is filled with incredible actresses who are beautiful and uniquely amazing. However, some performers are just destined to become towering presences in XXX. There is a whole bevy of tall...

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Saturday Special: Fine, Fingered Femmes Part III

You have to admire a beautiful woman who stays in touch with herself—especially if she lets you watch while she does so. With that in mind, let your fingers do the walking through our latest celebration of Honeys who take a hands-on approach to their pleasure. And when you’re done here, make sure to check...

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Sleep-Whacking

Exploring the phenomenon of sexsomnia, a sleep disorder that causes people to get 40 wanks along with their 40 winks. Everyone knows someone who sleepwalks, but chances are they’ve never met anyone who sleep-whacks—until it’s too late. They could be all cozied up in bed next to a new lay, dreaming about getting their muffs...

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Anniversary 2014

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Since we don’t do three-martini lunches anymore…

“Since we don’t do three-martini lunches anymore, how about we do three marijuana brownies instead?”...

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A freight train hit a bus carrying Catholic schoolgirls…

A freight train hit a bus carrying Catholic schoolgirls, and they all perished. After ascending to heaven, the girls lined up and were greeted by Saint Peter at the pearly gates. Pointing to one girl, he asked, “Jessica, have you ever had any contact with a penis?” Jessica giggled, then shyly answered, “I once touched...

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Sam announced to his wife…

Sam announced to his wife, “Amy, I’ve got a problem.” “No, dear, we have a problem,” Amy responded. “We are married, we are a unit, and your problem is my problem. We are in this together.” Overwhelmed, not to mention very relieved, Sam muttered, “It’s hardly worth mentioning now.” But Amy was insistent. “What’s the...

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Clowning on Counseling

Even the strongest marriages hit bumps sometimes—and, let’s face it, many marriages aren’t that strong to begin with. (There’s a reason why half of them end in divorce.) But one person’s marital issues are another person’s source of laughter, and there are plenty of yuks to be had over the topic of matrimonial discord. So...

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November 2021

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In Love With Lust

Erika Lust, you’ve done it again! The legendary adult filmmaker (go watch Primary now!) is a shoo-in for Boss of the Year, and not just because of her commitment to diversity and female-centric pleasure. To support the well-being of her 36 employees, Lust issued a simple edict: Go fuck yourselves. In recognition of Masturbation Month...

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Penis Girl to the Rescue!

Portland has not had much to smile about recently. Between peaceful protests met with police brutality and piece-of-shit Proud Boys shooting passers-by with paintball guns, it’s safe to say Oregonians could use a bit of a diversion right about now. Thank God for Penis Girl. The eponymous graffiti tag popped up in the city roughly...

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Dear Jessie…

Every once in a while men don’t suck (I’m a man and have the self-awareness to know that my gender can do way better). Sex is about pleasure, yours and your partner’s, but altruism is oft overlooked in the pursuit of self-pleasure. You know who isn’t a selfish lover? Every guy quoted in a BuzzFeed...

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Lactation Nation

What would Freud have to say? Who cares about that fossil and his outdated theories. All that matters is what makes you happy, and if breastfeeding gets you there, then suckle to your heart’s content (with consent, that is). However you choose to experience it, either as a watcher or active participant, adult breastfeeding (ABF)...

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Britney, Let’s Talk

Hi, Britney. Longtime fan, first-time open letter writer. We here at HUSTLER have been following your experiences closely and want you to know that we are here to offer our support, solidarity and, if you’re interested, a platform to share your voice. We also couldn’t help but notice your recent Instagram posts of the topless...

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Billionaire Porn

Terrible-meme enthusiast and billionaire industrialist Elon Musk recently joined a very exclusive club. So exclusive that, to our knowledge, he is the only member (so far): billionaire porn star. Or so they wish over at Nafty, a finance platform catering to the adult entertainment industry. Following one of Musk’s trademark Twitter blitzes, including the standard...

humor

Turkey Day Stuffing

Thanksgiving, Turkey Day—whatever you call it, it’s the greatest eating day of the year. We gorge on that glorious bird, packed with enough tryptophan to knock out a rhinoceros. But what if, sitting there like a bloated bag of bones on your parents’ BarcaLounger, you feel the urge to call up an old high school...