Sure, hooking up with a former partner for attachment-free sex is a tempting prospect—but there are potential downsides. Let us lead you through the minefield of banging an ex.
When two people start dating, it’s all pheromones, fun and non-stop porking. These love-sick fools, naïve as they might be, never stop to think for a second that they’ll likely end up hating each other’s guts in a matter of months and might even be shacked up with other people by then. Relationships are, for better or worse, wildly schizophrenic. We move in, and we move on.
There are times, however, that we, for whatever reason, get horny as hell for our exes again. Perhaps we’re gluttons for punishment. But then again, maybe we just remember how they handled themselves in bed and are desperately longing for more. Sure, that no-good, broke-ass piece of shit wasn’t worth two flying squirts when it came to lending emotional support and helping around the house, but they sure as heck could make us howl like a wounded honey badger in the sack.
“I have an ex-boyfriend that I really want to sleep with again, but only because he chows box like it’s his last supper.”Aubrey
“I have an ex-boyfriend that I really want to sleep with again, but only because he chows box like it’s his last supper,” Aubrey, a 35-year-old business strategy consultant from Detroit, Michigan, tells HUSTLERMagazine.com. “I hate him though, so who knows if I’d squirt on his face or piss on it.”
It might seem borderline certifiable to even consider hooking up with an ex for a night of attachment-free sex. Exes are exes for a reason, and they should probably stay in the past. After all, there are plenty of other unworthy slobs out there to bone, all of them chock-full of inadequacies, the same as the rest of us. To challenge a past lover to a random mattress rematch… well, that has all the makings for disaster. No sane man is going to piss on an electric fence again after it nearly blows his dick off.
But that doesn’t stop presumably thousands of these hopeless hard-ons from waxing nostalgic for past nookie.