Bits & Pieces
Articles with unfiltered opinions
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Bits & Pieces
Porn Is Good for You
Ever since serial killer/knob Ted Bundy blamed hardcore pornography for fueling his horrendous crimes, many a misguided soul has taken it for granted that porn consumption leads to the objectification and...
Bits & Pieces
Trump’s Teenie Weenie
You know things are going badly for the GOP when even a Fox News focus group spits out words like “shameful,” “disappointing,” “despicable” and “disgusting” to describe the debate...
Bits & Pieces
Carmen Electrifies
Here at HUSTLER, we dig into shit, in this case Kocktails With Khloé, so you don’t have to. We’re not sure who’s responsible for greenlighting this, the latest spelling-challenged, televised turd to...
Bits & Pieces
Truly Mortifying
The hundreds gathered at Thornhill Crematorium in Cardiff to mourn a man killed in a car accident were horrified to see hardcore porn projected during the funeral service. The X-rated footage appeared on a...
Bits & Pieces
Young John’s Schlong
“I can keep an erection almost indefinitely,” porn legend John Holmes told HUSTLER in 1983. “I can also keep an erection straddling a girl at the edge of a cliff, looking down at 300 feet of nothing,...
Bits & Pieces
Club Girl: Shavelle Love
Shavelle declares. “It’s a place where anything goes. I love the heat. Traffic isn’t bad. Everything is open. Parking is never a problem. And there’s always a pool party somewhere!”...
Bits & Pieces
Rooms With a View
Suspecting that she might be her generation’s Don McCullin, 17-year-old Jo Broughton wanted to change the world through photography. Thing is, she sucked at art school. “I was really bad,” she laughs....
Bits & Pieces
Furry Fury
Hey, furries, Tony the Tiger has had it up to here with your smutty tweets. The Kellogg cereal mascot tried being patient with the furry fans who flooded his official Twitter account with lewd, lascivious...
Bits & Pieces
Hap-Penis
The world’s first FDA-cleared penis implant is here. Yeah, yeah—we know, bigger isn’t better, and most women say they don’t care how big a dick is (according to a 2014 report based on a study of 26,437...
Bits & Pieces
Satan Is My Copilot
Even those who avoid the Trinity Broadcasting Network got a nice whiff of bullshit when a segment from Kenneth Copeland’s Believer’s Voice of Victory recently went viral. Copeland, truly one of today’s...
Bits & Pieces
Somewhere, An Egret Cried
Pointing a gun at a Federal officer is a crime, but for almost a month, the government response to the antigovernment protest at the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge in Oregon was restrained, at...
Bits & Pieces
Club Girl: Melanie
After spending the last six months traveling back and forth between Minnesota and Las Vegas, our 25-year-old Club Girl decided to plant her high heels squarely in Sin City, where you can find her dancing at...
Bits & Pieces
Mean Tweets
Obama’s done it; kids do it; even Canadians do it. It didn’t take long for Jimmy Kimmel’s segment “Celebrities Read Mean Tweets” to drip its way through pop culture. Thing is, most porn stars don’t...
Bits & Pieces
XXX Mashup
There’s too much wanky guitar music to make it strictly educational, too much British accented voice-over to make it porn. A video clip titled “Camera Inside of the Vagina During Sex in Missionary...
Bits & Pieces
Pimp My Ride
Dutch parliament member Gert-Jan Segers got a stiff lesson in “If you don’t want the answer, don’t ask the question.” A member of the ChristenUnie, a socially conservative Christian political party,...
Bits & Pieces
Hot As Hell
New research from the National Bureau of Economic Research suggests that higher temperatures will hurt reproductive health by reducing both fertility and “coital frequency.” Hey, you can’t fool us—that...
Bits & Pieces
Club Girl: Onyx Muse
My regular customers always brighten up my night when they visit unexpectedly. When I connect with someone, we experience things together. Those memories are special, spiritual and therapeutic experiences that...
Bits & Pieces
Motherfuck
What makes us adore MILFs? Is it that certain grace a woman acquires with maturity? Is it the knowledge of pleasure and sexual experience she offers? Or is it simply the desire to feed some misplaced,...
