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Scarlit Scandal

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The Dentist

A married woman fell for her handsome new dentist. Soon she’d seduced him into a string of passionate encounters in the office after hours. But one day the dentist said, “Darling, we’ve got to stop seeing each other. Your husband is bound to get suspicious.” “Honey, there’s nothing to worry about,” his sexy patient assured...

humor

Strength In Numbers

If there’s anything the Trump Administration has taught us, it’s that size matters. Not just the size of your hands, but the size of your crowds on the National Mall. The Women’s March on January 21st attracted throngs of protesters all over the world. In Washington, according to “crowd scientists” (a booming new field, by...

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Grabbing Your Attention

A perk of being a celebrity or President (or in our case a celebrity President) is that you get wax figures sculpted in your likeness. Tourists get to overpay to visit your statue and trick their social media followers into believing they’re hanging out with actual stars. This practice was made famous by Madame Tussauds...

humor

Dick Picks

In the age of social media and online dating, the rules aren’t the same. Dating apps have bred a culture of constant hookups. If you’re a smooth dude, you can use Tinder to have a new woman every night, but what about the not-so-smooth dudes? There’s now an Instagram page devoted to shaming poor pickup...

humor

Stripping For Two

About a year back ThatOregonLife.com “reported” that a new club called Baby Bumpers was opening in the Springfield, Oregon, area. The club’s gimmick was to have women who were at least six months’ pregnant dancing onstage. But while research into the existence of such a club proved futile, it begged the question, is this an...

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“Are you sure this is the right way to measure my IQ?”

“Are you sure this is the right way to measure my IQ?”...

humor

“I was thinking. What if the Muslim ban goes into effect, but the terrorists just pretend to be Christians. You know, like us Republicans do!”

“I was thinking. What if the Muslim ban goes into effect, but the terrorists just pretend to be Christians. You know, like us Republicans do!”...

humor

“If you make any cracks about getting half off, I’ll head-butt you in the nuts!”

“If you make any cracks about getting half off, I’ll head-butt you in the nuts!”...

humor

“When Donald Trump said he wanted to take the country back, I didn’t think he would take it this far back!”

“When Donald Trump said he wanted to take the country back, I didn’t think he would take it this far back!”...

humor

“My goodness! You’re like a little child, Robert! How did you manage to get lipstick on your brand-new trousers?”

“My goodness! You’re like a little child, Robert! How did you manage to get lipstick on your brand-new trousers?”...

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“If she’s giving it away for free, there’s really nothing we can do.”

“If she’s giving it away for free, there’s really nothing we can do.”...

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“Thomas Jefferson was my favorite President. He wrote the Declaration of Independence, smoked marijuana and fucked black chicks!”

“Thomas Jefferson was my favorite President. He wrote the Declaration of Independence, smoked marijuana and fucked black chicks!”...

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“There are only two commandments you must follow: ‘Don’t come inside me’ and ‘Don’t come in my mouth.’”

“There are only two commandments you must follow: ‘Don’t come inside me’ and ‘Don’t come in my mouth.’”...

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“I’m feeling so depressed! My penis has died. Can I bury it in your vagina?”

“I’m feeling so depressed! My penis has died. Can I bury it in your vagina?”...

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“We could have done worse—we could have wound up with Bill Cosby!”

“We could have done worse—we could have wound up with Bill Cosby!”...

humor

“Bad dog! Bad!! How many times have I told you not to smoke my cigarettes?!”

“Bad dog! Bad!! How many times have I told you not to smoke my cigarettes?!”...

humor

“You told me that you voted for Trump! You must love this!”

“You told me that you voted for Trump! You must love this!”...

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