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humor

Hearing aid

Old Hank was boasting about his new hearing aid to his neighbor. “It cost me $5,000, but it’s the best there is.” “Really?” the neighbor wondered. “What kind is it?” “Twelve-thirty.”...

humor

Bad lawyer

Question: What do you call a lawyer gone bad? Answer: Senator....

humor

A middle-aged couple were walking down the street when a beautiful young woman blew the husband a kiss. “I met her last week,” the husband muttered. “Professionally of course.” “Which profession?” the wife in quired. “Yours or hers?” ...

humor

Graffilthy

There once was a womannamed Alice,Who used a dynamite stickas a phallus.They found her vaginaUp in North CarolinaAnd the rest of poor Alicein Dallas....

humor

The Academy Ah! Wards

humor

Whip It Good!

From a cat-o’-nine-tails to ball gags and nipple clamps, Sex Nerd Sandra knows the pleasures of pain. Her recent BDSM workshop at the West Hollywood Pleasure Chest schooled her captive audience on the basics from paddling to enemas. For more on our carnal coach, see the Holiday ’13 issue or visit SexNerdSandra.com. Props to The...

humor

Topless Tuesdays

Eight a.m. Another day, another fucking dollar, another godawful commute to the office. Then you pull up to the Devil’s Brew for your caffeine jolt. A barista brings you your order, flashes a smile and, best of all, her boobs are right in your face. Now that’s the way to start a day. If you’re...

humor

“If alcohol will never touch your lips, how about a big, juicy, throbbing cock?”

“If alcohol will never touch your lips, how about a big, juicy, throbbing cock?”...

humor

“In this next scene your parents have just died in a horrible car crash, and Leroy here comforts you by shoving his huge black cock in your ass. Action!”

“In this next scene your parents have just died in a horrible car crash, and Leroy here comforts you by shoving his huge black cock in your ass. Action!”...

humor

“Damn! The new torture field guide says we can’t use waterboarding, sleep deprivation or naked pictures of Ann Coulter to extract information from prisoners!”

“Damn! The new torture field guide says we can’t use waterboarding, sleep deprivation or naked pictures of Ann Coulter to extract information from prisoners!”...