Bits & Pieces

Articles with unfiltered opinions

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Dirty jokes for your dirty mind

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Latest Articles

Drive-Thru Sex
Bits & Pieces

Drive-Thru Sex

As if cuckoo clocks and chocolate weren’t enough of a contribution to global happiness, the Swiss have stepped up with a real third-act topper in the form of a safe and convenient solution for the sex work...
Celebrity Muff-Divers
Bits & Pieces

Celebrity Muff-Divers

DJ Khaled, that guy who will not stop shouting his name in every damn song, caused a bit of an uproar last spring when he casually declared on live radio that he does not partake in the eating of...
The Real Fake News: Mueller Witch Hunt Uncovers Coven
Bits & Pieces

The Real Fake News: Mueller Witch Hunt Uncovers Coven

WASHINGTON, D.C.—A year and a half into the Special Counsel investigation of Russia’s meddling in the 2016 Presidential election, Robert Mueller and his...
Sex Workers, Unite!
Feature

Sex Workers, Unite!

THE STAKES HAVE NEVER BEEN HIGHER FOR SEX WORKERS, WHO ARE STARING DOWN THE DOUBLE BARRELS OF THE DEADLY LEGISLATIVE COMBO SESTA/FOSTA. LEARN WHY THEIR FIGHT IS OURS AND HOW THESE RECENTLY ENACTED LAWS DO MORE...
Where’s the Love? Dating in the Digital Age
Feature

Where’s the Love? Dating in the Digital Age

DATING CAN BE A REAL CHORE THESE DAYS, WHAT WITH ALL THE SWIPING LEFT AND SWIPING RIGHT. WHAT SHOULD BE EXHILARATING AND FUN CAN SOMETIMES BECOME A STRESSFUL...
Dark Money Is Now Darker
Politics

Dark Money Is Now Darker

Transparency dies in the murky water of the swamp. Does anybody in the world think there’s too much transparency in American politics? That there isn’t enough secrecy in our electoral system?...
Google’s Black Eye
Politics

Google’s Black Eye

From the crack of dawn to the darkest hours of night, you are followed. In the most intimate detail, every step of your daily life is being permanently recorded without interruption—from your bed to your...
The Real Fake News: Miller Denies Santa Work Visa
Bits & Pieces

The Real Fake News: Miller Denies Santa Work Visa

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Senior immigration policy adviser to President Trump, Stephen Miller, announced last week that Kris Kringle will not be given his usual...
Sasquatch Porn
Bits & Pieces

Sasquatch Porn

­Has Bigfoot erotica finally cracked the mainstream? This very specific literary genre was at the center of a political firestorm in July as Leslie Cockburn, a Democratic candidate for Virginia’s 5th...
68 Is the New 69
Bits & Pieces

68 Is the New 69

Mutual oral pleasure is great and all, but is 69ing really the be-all and end-all of sexual positions? Sometimes it’s almost too much, you know? Too hard to focus, too many distractions. So maybe try the 68...
Houston, We Have a Fuck Doll
Bits & Pieces

Houston, We Have a Fuck Doll

Pranks, shenanigans, monkeyshines—they are the lifeblood of local news and the bane of cops everywhere. So it was a mixed blessing for media and law enforcement this summer when two...
Recycling Is Bad
Bits & Pieces

Recycling Is Bad

You would assume that some things are so basic, so intuitive, so intrinsically linked to our very survival, they need not be explained: Don’t fight a bear, avoid drinking bleach, and never reuse a condom. Of...
Justice Kennedy’s Parting Gifts
Politics

Justice Kennedy’s Parting Gifts

If I knew you were leaving, I’d have baked a cake, then refused to sell it to you. One might argue that the Republicans’ stolen majority on the U.S. Supreme Court hit rock...
America’s Greatness
Politics

America’s Greatness

There is a real danger in thinking that our country is always virtuous when its behavior obviously isn’t. Sometimes you read a passage that stops you in your tracks, and the world never looks quite the same...
Space Dick?
Bits & Pieces

Space Dick?

There are some pretty big dicks in Australia—or rather, from Australia, cough, Mel Gibson, cough—but only one you can see from space. And it’s resting comfortably between Hugh Jackman’s legs, dressed...
The Real Fake News: Dems Resist Trump With Biting Interpretive Dance
Bits & Pieces

The Real Fake News: Dems Resist Trump With Biting Interpretive Dance

WASHINGTON, D.C.—It’s a Sunday evening, and the typically calm Capitol is a cacophony of music,...
The Devirginizer
Bits & Pieces

The Devirginizer

­Face it, sex isn’t a cakewalk for everyone. Disabilities, anxieties—everyone comes to bed with their own baggage, and the pressure can be debilitating. But why go it alone when professional help is...
Jizz Facials
Bits & Pieces

Jizz Facials

If you’re a fan of giving or receiving messy, sticky cum facials, then you’re gonna love what these two bloggers have to say about the health benefits of hot loads. Angela Nwosu, from Nigeria, shares sex...
Gangbangs for All!
Bits & Pieces

Gangbangs for All!

Who knows what secrets lie in the hearts of women? Well, researchers at the University of Montreal apparently. Their study revealed a not-so-vanilla fantasy shared by many of the fairer sex. Published in the...
Twisted Tricks: Ten Odious Ideas for 10/31
Feature

Twisted Tricks: Ten Odious Ideas for 10/31

Halloween’s history is older than that godforsaken, stale candy corn people still insist on handing out every year. To be fair, there are really two...
Scared Stiff: Truly Terrifying Tales
Feature

Scared Stiff: Truly Terrifying Tales

Gather close, and prepare to be scared out of your skin! It’s a true celebration of terror as you’re guided through the world’s most notorious, sensational, horrifying...