Bits & Pieces

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March 2026

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Pen Pals

Sex Workers Helping Sex Workers Behind Bars The difference between people inside and outside of prison is often good versus bad luck, rather than good versus bad people. Sex workers are particularly attuned to this reality. Unlike the general public, we don’t have the luxury of living in denial and believing that people in prison...

Greedflation Drives Inflation

As citizens around the world suffer from rampant, runaway inflation and ever-increasing costs of living, some corporate honchos and Federal Reserve officials have pointed to a small rise in overall compensation to American workers as the problem. These are the selfish, hypocritical voices of oligarchy. It’s been well established that “real wages” for American workers...

Memphis Monroe & Mick Blue

2006 was not a stellar time for HUSTLER girl copy. Badly mangled lyrics with the instructions “Sung to the tune of…” sometimes substituted for text about our gorgeous models or for copy about hardcore sex. We admit it and apologize. It is not a mistake we are inclined to repeat...

Charly Summer

“I started in the industry by posting sexy content on Reddit. I remember, I posted a picture of my butt in a kitchen, and I wrote, ‘I may not be a Top Chef, but I’d look good on top of one.’ That photo made it to the front page of...

Halloween Hotties

Is a bunny scary? Depends on the bunny and whether or not it’s been eating raspberries (we can’t get enough of those videos, seriously). Suffice it to say, Halloween is so much more than frights and undead horrors—sometimes Halloween can be cute, quirky or even Christmassy. Allow us to explain… HUSTLER polled adult performers to...

Double Bs The Documentary

The history and relationship of nudity in horror is essential learning, but who wants to read a dry academic dissertation when you can watch topless alt babes discuss it in depth on camera? Is it exploitation? More like meta-exploitation, but it’s all for a good cause, so just sit back and enjoy some boobs with...

Die Like a Pro

Want to scream like the queens? Welcome to Rebecca Vanguard’s Fetish Horror Acting Master Class. The first three rows will be sprayed in viscera. Rebecca has been making porn since 2017, but did you know that she is also an award-winning actor and hardcore horror fan? A frequent collaborator of director SamHel (Pink Material/A Baroque...

Scary Sexy

In the world of adult entertainment, one name is synonymous with porn parodies that continually delight, entertain and arouse: the visionary himself, director Axel Braun. Fun fact, Axel’s first-ever foray into sexy satire was for HUSTLER: the 2009 classic This Ain’t Happy Days XXX (sit on it!). Since then he’s won so many awards, we’d...

Gentlemen Prefer Goths

Luna Dahlia is the nightmare of your dreams. A goth escort hailing from the ninth circle of hell, our special guest columnist for this year’s Halloween issue muses on the undying appeal of dark temptresses and how there’s no boner like a fear boner: “If you have even a passing interest in blackclad beauties who...

Cinema of the Damned!

Tired of the same old vampire movies every October? Granted, Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992) and The Hunger (1983) are classics for a reason, but the canon goes so much deeper than the hits. This year, sink your teeth into the sweet flesh of some lesser-known flicks that don’t suck. Faithful readers will remember ace actor...

I wish to express…

“I wish to express my deepest sympathy, sir, on the recent passing of your wife.”...

You’re Marjorie Taylor…

“You’re Marjorie Taylor Greene’s husband? Good God, man! Jump while you still have the chance!”...

I’m a bi…

“I’m a bisexual. I have sex, and then I say bye.”...

This Smith guy doesn’t…

“This Smith guy doesn’t seem to have any balls. He hasn’t tried to grope, fondle, tongue-kiss, tit-grab or dry-hump anyone!”...

Little Johnny dashed home one afternoon and, short of breath…

Little Johnny dashed home one afternoon and, short of breath, told his mother, “I was at the playground and saw Daddy’s car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went to look for them and saw Daddy giving Aunt Jane a big kiss. Then he helped her take off her dress, and she helped...

Joe walked into a bar, sat down and asked…

Joe walked into a bar, sat down and asked, “Hey, bartender, got any specials today?” “As a matter of fact, we do,” the bar­keep replied. “We have a new drink in­vented by a gynecologist patron of ours. It’s a mixture of Pabst Blue Ribbon and Smirnoff vodka.” “Geez,” Joe gasped, “what the hell is that?”...

An old man named Fred was sitting on a bench at the mall…

An old man named Fred was sitting on a bench at the mall. A few minutes later a young punk walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors—green, red, or­ange, blue, yellow. The geezer just stared at him. The punk said sarcastically, “What’s the matter, Gramps? Never...

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