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October 2021

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Ugly Dudes With Hot Chicks: What Gives?
Featured Article

Ugly Dudes With Hot Chicks: What Gives?

Why do so many attractive women seem to go for homely guys? (Spoiler alert: It’s not always money.) Join us as we unravel the mystery of the Beauty and the Beast dynamic.

“I am not an animal! I am a human being. I am a man.” – J. Merrick

If you’ve been out on the town lately and noticed that there seems to be a disproportionate number of smoking-hot women hanging off the arms of Elephant Men, you’re not alone. This phenomenon is perhaps the greatest unsolved mystery of our time. What makes perfect tens, goddesses and other boner-inducing models of the female persuasion want to roll around naked with dudes who, on their best days, look like Shrek? 

The easy answer, of course, is money. After all, “Damn, that ugly bastard must be loaded” is the typical refrain uttered by a man anytime he spots some dude with a woman that he should ever be able to so much as trick into a conversation, much less a date and sex. It’s the notion that the size of some gnarly mutant’s bank account serves as the ultimate aphrodisiac. But is it really as simple as all that? Or are we, the seemingly average-looking, just jealous that so many unsightly dudes seem to have it all figured out?

It turns out there have been quite a few studies done on the Beauty and the Beast dynamic over the years. Our guess is that scientists were in a hurry to get to the bottom of this wild wonder so they could finally get out of the lab and into some tail. However, what’s interesting about the data is that this bizarre occurrence isn’t just a figment of our emotionally scarred, envious imagination. No, it is not. Amazingly enough, women are really going for less attractive men. 

But why?

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