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Latest HUSTLER Magazine cover issue
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June 2024

Misha Cross and Agatha Vega
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Facial Recognition
Featured Article

Facial Recognition

Is coating your partner’s face in gonad goop bad sexual manners, or a loving tribute after a good, satisfying fuck? We get to the bottom of this sticky debate.

Watch enough skin flicks, and you start to develop the impression that women, every last horny one of them, thoroughly enjoy getting their faces handsomely glazed with a man-sized dollop of gonad goop when their partner achieves orgasm. From the full-bush smut of the 1970s to the shaven mavens of modern-day porn, there seems to be one distinct finishing feature in adult films that has remained constant, and that’s the ladies really eating it up when a man aims his cum cannon at their face just as his load comes blasting out. Ssssssssplat! 

In XXX, a facial—as these ball-blasts to a woman’s noggin are popularly referred to—is the gift that keeps on dribbling. In the real world, the ladies often contend that porn is all one big theatrical display, and that many civilian females don’t especially appreciate a fusillade of nut nectar to the kisser. In some respects, some of the more conservative cooze would argue, gunking on a woman’s mug is degrading, demoralizing and, quite honestly, a good way for a man to get his ass kicked if his man-mayo messes up her hair. Maureen of Olathe, Kansas, tells that letting a man dole out a facial is like letting “the family dog take a piss on you.”

“I like to be dominated, so I do it because it seems to give my partner pleasure. There’s always consent; he would never do it if I didn’t want to.”

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