A practical and emotional guide to planning a group sex session.
Having group sex with one’s partner might seem like an enticing—and simple enough—proposition, but there is much that needs to happen for this fantasy to materialize as reality. How, who, where, and so many other details to consider—like, should I serve hors d’oeuvres?
And, like any big decision you navigate with your significant other, it should begin with an open, honest and judgment-free conversation. There are myriad emotional hurdles to negotiate on your way to being buried in a sea of writhing, sweaty flesh.
Feeling a bit overwhelmed? Relax. Sex Coach Leigh, a certified sex coach and clinical sexologist, is here to guide you. Loyal HUSTLER readers may remember Sex Coach Leigh from an article by yours truly about the dynamics of polyamory. Now she’s back to help us come to grips with this unicorn-like sexual experience. You can do it!
HUSTLERMagazine.com: Let’s assume that we’re talking about couples, and that one person is interested in an orgy and trying to broach the subject with their partner. How do you approach this conversation without freaking your partner out?
Sex Coach Leigh: Start with talking about your fantasies. While people might not want to actually follow through with all the things they fantasize about, it’s a good way to gauge possible interest. See how they react to you, and then ease into asking if this is something they would do if they could. If fantasy and dirty talk aren’t already a part of your bedroom repertoire, find a list of sexual activities online (usually called a “yes/no/maybe list”) and fill them out separately, then get together to compare notes. Frame it as a way to bring some newness into your sex life. If your partner answers “yes” or “maybe” to questions about group sex or adding partners, this is an easy way to initiate the conversation. You could also watch a movie that features group sex, like Eyes Wide Shut or Short Bus, to get the conversation going.
What should be taken into consideration when a couple opens the door to the possibility of multiple, simultaneous sexual partners in a shared setting?
