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December 2023

Azura Grace
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Sit on My Face!
Featured Article

Sit on My Face!

Getting to the bottom of the glorious but often-maligned practice of face-sitting.

Women love getting their snatches licked out by a true muff-diving warrior, one who goes at it like he’s on a mission to advance his way to North Korea via the treacherous Tumen River, risking drowning, being gunned down or eaten by a wild animal to rid the world of communism. But some men, for one reason or another, lack the zeal to get the job done. Even a guy with a man-size appetite for beaver doesn’t always give it the proper tongue-lashing it deserves. That’s presumably why a lot of ladies prefer to plop down on a man’s face and take matters into their own hands. Yes, indeed, boys—they want to take control over their cunnilingus experience and drown their dudes in poon juice from on high. 

“It’s really tough to breathe with her on my face. It’s like deep diving with no oxygen tank. I need a snorkel or something.”


If there exists a challenge in all this face-sitting business, it’s that very few people take it seriously. It’s not one of those sex acts that gets a lot of traction. Most of the time, it’s treated as a joke, giving everyone a laugh as soon as it is brought up. One reason it’s not a more respected technique within the lapping arts community—at least according to some men—is that certain guys don’t like the idea of being waterboarded in the bedroom like they’re being tortured for information. “It’s really tough to breathe with her on my face,” Justin, a 32-year-old from Elmwood Park, Illinois, tells “It’s like deep diving with no oxygen tank. I need a snorkel or something.”

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