December 2019

Featuring Scarlett Sage

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Chanel Preston’s Stroke of Genius

Strange but true: Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and XXX superstar Chanel Preston have a lot in common.

I’m not talking about a shared affinity for double anal penetration. History doesn’t reveal if the legendary composer was a sexual virtuoso like the luscious Ms. Preston, but it does present us with some other surprising similarities. Both Mozart and Chanel were musical prodigies at an early age, dedicating themselves to the piano at three and four, respectively. Both also had mild ADD (attention deficit disorder) symptoms and were impulsive, easily distracted, hyperactive overachievers. By the time he was 16, Herr Mozart had composed hundreds of difficult pieces of music and toured the great concert halls of Europe. Sweet 16-year-old Chanel had mastered the trumpet in addition to the piano; taken up painting and sculpture; and also found time to join the high school band, the wrestling team, the track team and the theater club. Oh. Almost forgot. She’d also learned how to give a helluva blowjob.  

In the case of Mozart, outside of the fact that he died too young, the dude did pretty well for himself. He’s not remembered for being a quirky, hyperactive douchebag (which he was, by the way); he’s revered as one of the greatest composers of all time. Chanel Preston…well, we’re still in the middle of that tale. My assignment was to spend the day with this preposterously sexy ball of endless energy and see if she too was on the road to legend status.

When I hook up with Chanel, the first thing I discover is that she hits the ground running. Virtually every morning she starts her day with a three-to-four- mile jog along the canals near her Venice, California, home. “I like to test my body’s limits,” she tells me with a breathy laugh. “Porn keeps me in the best shape of my life.”

But before she was a fit, international sex symbol, Chanel Preston was a lot of different things, and none of them were working for her. “I’m from Alaska,” she explains. “The land of Bristol Palin. An unbelievably dull place to grow up. There’s literally nothing to do half the year. A lot of my high school girlfriends ended up pregnant. My two older sisters were pregnant at 16 and 17. That wasn’t going to happen to me.”

When Chanel graduated high school, she immediately left the frozen tundra of Fairbanks, Alaska, for the warm beaches of Hawaii, determined to make a big success out of her life in a moose-free zone. The only problem was, she didn’t have a clue how she was going to do it.

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