If things haven’t been so hot and heavy between you and your gal lately, you’ll definitely want to take notes from this lady who loves ladies.
You’re just a man, standing in front of a woman, asking her to have sex with you. But she’s not really feeling it. Maybe she hasn’t been feeling it for a while. A person’s libido goes up and down, and there are definitely external factors that can contribute to that (pregnancy, menopause, medication, the state of the world)—but what if she’s just not in the mood? What if you’ve found yourself morphing into the cliché sitcom husband, shrugging your shoulders while your wife says, “Not tonight honey, I have a headache”? Is there anything that can be done?
Hell yeah, there is, and I’m just the lesbian to help (and not by stealing your girl). A number of studies have been conducted in the last decade about the “orgasm gap”—the vast difference between the percentage of straight men who regularly orgasm and the percentage of straight women who do. The largest of these, a 2016 study of 52,000 respondents by the Archives of Sexual Behavior, determined that 95% of straight men “always or usually” have orgasms during sex, compared to 65% of straight women.
And lesbians? Eighty-six percent. Even in studies with slightly different results, the overarching point remains consistent: Women have more orgasms alone or with other women than with men.
For lots of women, building arousal needs to start way before what we typically think of as foreplay.