Dating can feel like a battlefield—and you can bet that the ladies have their strategies and tactics for striking down the cheaters, deadbeats and scrubs out there. We explore five defensive dating maneuvers women use and how they work.
Dating is supposed to be a fun little adventure—complete with dirty martinis, sushi nights, and Netflix and chill—that might lead to a good, dirty time between the sheets. Of course, that’s in a perfect world. For most women, the reality is that dating is a war zone. They’re out there trying to navigate dinner and drinks like Homeland’s Carrie Mathison attempting to stop a terror plot. At least in the beginning, it’s a recon mission to figure out whether the guy sitting across from them is someone they can get naked with long-term without ending up feeling heartbroken and used. Such wariness is warranted—biology has, over the years, hardwired men to do the old disappearing routine after they get their dicks wet, and women, well, they got really tired of crying over spilled milk and giving away the cow for free…or whatever.
According to a new study from the Shams Higher Education Institute, womankind has developed five modern deception-detection strategies designed to weed out the fuckboys and frat bros before things progress too far. In other words, women have turned their bullshit detectors into a full-blown field manual for psychological warfare in modern courtship. Below, we break down these five techniques for your dating edification.
Interrogation: Just the Facts, Man
If women have learned anything from years of being jerked around by charming men with shady intentions, it’s that the warning signs were always there—they just didn’t look closely enough to see them. Most guys show up to the first few dates with airtight cover stories polished to perfection. The problem is that those stories eventually reek of bullshit. Contradictions tend to start floating to the surface as soon as he gets some. “Men never tell the whole truth on a date,” Becca, 28, tells HUSTLERMagazine.com. Researchers say modern women are out there leading with questions, digging hard for inconsistencies in a man’s narrative. Nothing is off-limits—she wants a full report. She’s going to get it too. Some women even repeat the same questions on subsequent dates. They want to see if the man’s answers start wobbling like a newborn calf. Often, they already know the truth before they ask, and one wrong answer can end the whole coital audition on the spot. And when suspicion lingers, they bring in the family. A guy might sweet-talk his way past her, but he’s not slipping one by mom, dad and Uncle Harold.
But here’s the thing—men expect to be interrogated during the first few dates, anyway. That’s all part of getting to know each other. In fact, they have questions of their own. How far the grilling goes, however, can be a turn-off for some. “Just because I don’t tell you everything on the first date doesn’t mean I’m lying or just trying for sex,” asserts Jaime of Lexington, Kentucky. “I can meet your family and pass whatever that test is, but that still doesn’t mean we’re guaranteed to get married.”
