What does the way you drive say about your sexual style? Buckle up and prepare to be enlightened!
Anyone who’s ever been stuck at a red light knows the utter frustration. The second it turns green, the driver in front of you—usually some imbecilic asshat in a minivan checking their cell phone to see if they’ve gotten any new likes on that photo they posted of their ugly kids —sits there in hesitation like they’re waiting for an engraved invitation to put their foot on the gas pedal. You sit there fuming mad, beating on the horn, hands up, cursing their existence, inventing new words that’ll surely get you named on a government watch list. Maybe you even bark something like, “You drive like old people fuck” as you recklessly swerve past the slow bastard, middle finger flying high, before speeding off down the road, wishing they’d burn alive in a fiery crash before the next light.
Well, you might want to pump the brakes and read this, Mario Angry-etti. Interestingly, if what the porking pros have to say on this matter is true, that impulsive, unhinged road-raging exchange could expose more of our bedroom secrets than we’d probably care to admit.
“He drove like he was afraid and ate pussy like he was scared of that too.”
