Bits & Pieces
Articles with unfiltered opinions
For months, Samantha (Mia Lelani) had been hunting for someone to help her build a time machine. The idea had come to Samantha in a dream; she’d done rough sketches but needed a scientist to construct a prototype.
When Dan (Otto Bauer) responded to her ad, Samantha was suspicious. He claimed to have graduated from Harvard with degrees in time travel and boning. Dan also told Samantha to meet him at his workshop—wearing only lingerie.
Once Samantha and Dan made eye contact, though, sparks flew. Clothing was discarded; genitals were aroused; fluids were shared. When they were done screwing, Dan asked to see Samantha’s sketches. “Hmm,” he said. “It looks like you’ve just drawn several pictures of a giraffe fucking a toaster.”
“Shhh,” Samantha whispered. “I don’t want anyone to steal my idea before I patent it.”
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