Bits & Pieces
Articles with unfiltered opinions
If goopy dollops of nut nectar were the only things dribbling from chicks’ orifices in Teen Creampies Vol. 2, this would be a more-than-solid spank flick. As it is, before viewers are treated to spunk-injected snatches squeezing out their blobby cargo, they’re subjected to lengthy passages of pre-scene blather that will have them reaching for the fast-forward button instead of their cocks. Florida brunette Misty Quinn spends precious time holding forth on a number of topics, such as how her oversize ass was built on pastries. Unless you’re the type of guy who sprouts wood while walking past your neighborhood bakery, who cares? Luckily, after Quinn pairs up with Michael Stefano, things get as real and raw as a hobo knife fight—Stefano mounts Quinn’s Kardashian-proportioned haunches and hammers away. After going on about her upbringing in small-town West Virginia, tight-bodied gamine Ellie Eilish gets put through her paces with what’s purported to be her first creampie, on-screen anyway. Before dribbling Stefano’s load from between her cunt flaps, Eilish serves up an impressively athletic scene. She gives Stefano’s angry purple prick a footjob with the dexterity of a trained chimp and yips and yaps her way through a variety of intriguing positions, including what one might call a sideways cowgirl. With her neon-rainbow getup and compact frame, Jessie Saint looks like a possessed sock puppet, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as she gets humped into next Wednesday. It’s just a shame that viewers have to wade through Saint’s pre-fuck gabfest first. Teen Creampies Vol. 2 would have been tastier with less yapping and more tapping. —Pico D. Ribibi
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