Bits & Pieces
Articles with unfiltered opinions
It’s hard to watch Behind the Gates of Onyx Ridge Estates and not picture a pitch meeting where someone blurts out, “I’ve got it! Gossip Girl—but with cum-shots! The description of this offering reads, “A mysterious gossip columnist recounts the sexual liaisons going on in the prestigious gated community of Onyx Ridge,” and that’s pretty much what the viewer receives. Not that it’s a bad setup, and in the capable hands of couples-porn maestro James Avalon, it’s the kind of flick that will keep the ol’ lady’s mind engaged while her pussy juices up. If you’re watching solo, feel free to fast-forward through the dishy exposition of the aforementioned gossip columnist—dubbed “Betty Behind the Gates”—and get straight to the action. Stacked, sturdy brunette Sofi Ryan looks like she could take a rough dicking and lift the bed to retrieve the discarded condom afterward. Ryan tugs at Damon Dice’s dick like it’s a weed she’s pulling from the garden—before Dice plugs away at her while her massive jugs surge like ships on a stormy sea. Comely carrot-top Lacy Lennon plays a rich bitch with a bad attitude. Luckily, her husband (Quinton James) is able to chip away at her icy exterior one steely-pricked thrust at a time. Lean, exotic fox Scarlit Scandal is as flexible as she is attractive, folding into a series of tricky positions like a piece of erotic origami. Despite the hints of scandal and intrigue, Behind the Gates of Onyx Ridge Estates doesn’t do much to reveal any mysteries; maybe they saved that for the sequel (and yes, there is a sequel). In the meantime, the scenery is most enjoyable.
—P.D.R.
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