Bits & Pieces

Articles with unfiltered opinions

Cartoons

Illustrated monthly funnies

Jokes

Dirty jokes for your dirty mind

Parodies

Unapologetic political satire

close slideout
Latest HUSTLER Magazine cover issue
Magazine new arrow

October 2024

Featuring Nata Gold
Join HUSTLER Magazine trial promo image

Intro Offer:
3 days for only $0.99!

HUSTLER Honey Simi
Vital Facts
  • Hometown Korycany, Czech Republic
  • Age 20
  • Horoscope Cancer
  • Height 5-6

About Simi

“I’m glad you called me now and not 15 minutes ago,” Simi gushes, “because I never answer the phone when I’m screwing!” Asked to talk about her sex life, the Czech newbie admits, “I’m a lot like a guy: I need it all the time. The best day I ever had was when this amazing guy did me again and again, and I came eight times in a row!”

Being this horny does have a downside. “Guys just can’t seem to keep up with me,” Simi sighs. “It takes a special man to satisfy me. Sadly, most of the men I meet don’t last or stick around. Maybe that’s why I’m always looking for a boyfriend. It’s okay. I’d rather masturbate than have sex with a two-minute man.”

How did the busty brunette end up in our magazine? Simi chuckles, then exclaims, “I have no idea! But I love having the opportunity to model in America part-time. It’s very exciting to fly into Los Angeles and do photo-shoots. I feel like a real jet-setter! Growing up, I was a bit of an ugly duckling, all gangly, clumsy and shy. Then a few years ago I realized I looked good naked and wanted to share that with the world. Things move so fast here. One day I’m answering an ad in a newspaper, and now I’m in HUSTLER! I can’t wait to see what’s next!”

HUSTLER Gallery Passport to Pleasure


Find Simi In

Shop HUSTLER Hollywood

Shop All Sex Toys

More Honeys