Slut Puppies 9

As anyone who’s ever brought a stray home knows, strict obedience training is vital to developing a proper dynamic with your new pet. In Slut Puppies 9, four pretty pooches receive the firm-yet-fair guidance that they require and are duly rewarded with juicy bones to play with. The festivities kick off with Carter Cruise, a tight-bodied young blonde whose efforts to put on a webcam show are disrupted by a noisy gardening crew outside her window. She resolves the dilemma in the most porn-logical way possible—by inviting the half-dozen laborers up to her place to film the show with her. By scene’s end, Cruise’s face is a glazed masterpiece that gives Cinnabon a run for its money.

Later on, doe-eyed vixen Ariana Marie, sporting a pink collar and a meticulously shaved quim, takes a four-star pounding from a pair of goons who leave her with dark red handprints on her pert ass and a thoroughly gooey mug deserving of a blue ribbon. Slut Puppies 9 earns its pedigree in the hardest—which is to say, the best—way possible.