More Than Friends

More Than Friends seeks to poke holes in the dreaded friend zone one blood-swollen thrust at a time. The proceedings kick off with Carolina Sweets, a brunette who’s a bit doughy around the middle and has tits that could generously be described as modest. Luckily those shortcomings are offset by a girl-next-door charm. Sweets is paired with a dude who seems like he reluctantly skipped the local Pride parade to film this scene. Nonetheless, it’s a fairly convincing performance; one can almost imagine that he isn’t closing his eyes and thinking of Ricky Martin as Sweets slobbers on his beef baton and sucks his scum orbs. Joseline Kelly, who has eyebrows like caterpillars that have been fed a steady diet of Rogaine, commingles with her blond, pigtailed gal pal, nuzzling on her friend’s Tater Tot titties before lapping at her fuzzy croissant. It’s a passionate enough coupling, though you’d probably only drool over these chicks if they were waiting for you outside the prison gates after your ten-year sentence. Exotic, pretty Katrina Jade provides a brief respite, with fabulous tits and an ass that’s built for punishment. But by this point you’ll probably have already tucked your cock back behind your zipper and called it a night. More Than Friends is less than impressive. —P.D.R.