Exotics

Slick and diverse as those Benetton ads of yore (except, ya know, with cum shots),Exotics bonds races together with the universal sealant of semen and pussy juice. The results will have viewers pumping their fists in solidarity as they’re wrapped around their appreciative cocks. This isn’t Citizen Kane by any measure, but Jules Jordan’s directorial efforts are to be commended. He truly seems to care about things like lighting and angles and other factors that appear to be lost on the current pornscape. Tight-bodied minx Scarlit Scandal boasts a taut, jutting ass and just enough titty to keep your mouth full. Scandal pairs up with a skinny, tattooed white dude who has a crotch stalk that’s roughly the length of Scandal’s forearm. This freakish hybrid of John Holmes and a carnival worker leads Scandal through an acrobatic fuck (something akin to Cirque du Soleil with hardcore penetration) that ultimately leaves her sweaty, cock-drunk and coated in baby batter. Pint-size Asian fuck puppet Vina Sky turns in a scene that’s both jaw-dropping and dick-stiffening. Despite being not much bigger than a garden gnome, Sky—delectably decked out in fetish-friendly accoutrements—submits to the tag team of Jordan and horse-hung Steve Holmes, who double-stuff her pussy, packing it tighter than a clown car. Alas, the quality takes a noticeable dip from there: Moriah Mills, with her comically outsize curves and a pussy that gushes like a fire hydrant, feels like a novelty pick. But up to that point, Exotics is worth exploring. —P.D.R.