Classic Porn

Some would argue that adult entertainment had a golden era. Others might suggest that erotica is an ever-evolving art form progressing toward its ultimate state. Classic Porn finds itself at a middle ground, filtering the history of cinematic filth through the modern sensibilities of budding XXX auteur Kayden Kross. This video is billed as Kross’s “take on the most classic porn scenarios in a brand-new volume of finely crafted smut.” As anyone who’s seen Kross’s work knows, her stylistic imprint is strong. The maiden scene features blonde Kenna James and brunette Evelyn Claire as female roommates who are either moving into or out of their apartment. Mainly it’s a standard Kross offering, marked by soft music and lighting. It definitely works, but a subsequent scene, featuring Bree Daniels employing the sexual services of a plumber in her 1950s-style kitchen, adheres to a much more retro aesthetic. Redheaded and as curvy as a mountain road, Daniels will appeal to anyone who waited in vain for a Mad Men scene where Christina Hendricks forced a ropyveined cock past her tonsils. A jazz-inflected vignette follows, where a writer bangs exotic pizza girl Gina Valentina, and the video closes with a spandex-clad tribute to the fitness-obsessed ’80s. Kross’s nod to smut’s past is passable, but she should probably keep her eye on the future by creating her own modern blue-screen classic. —P.D.R.