Barely Legal #163: Halloween Special

You have to feel sorry for Halloween—up until a couple of years ago it pretty much had the market cornered on fear-driven mask-wearing. Now? Not so much. Still, All Hallows’ Eve is definitely our sexiest holiday, as evidenced by Barely Legal #163: Halloween Special, which will make your sac bulge with its array of sweet, mouthwatering delights. Waifish charmer Izzy Lush pairs up with some dude to investigate a house where lesbians are rumored to have killed themselves after a sexual tryst on Halloween years ago. Lush is dolled up in a slutty nurse costume, while the dude sports a knockoff Jason mask, so the scenario makes the average season of American Horror Story seem cohesive by comparison. Still, it’s a delight to watch Lush pound her face on her partner’s prong like she’s bobbing for apples. Busty ebony schoolgirl Daizy Cooper dresses up as a scarecrow hot enough to give Ray Bolger’s ghost a hard-on. Her teacher confronts her about a journal entry in which she details her sexual fantasies about him, and before you can say, “Boo!” Cooper is splayed out on a desk and enjoying a cram session courtesy of her instructor’s veiny meat wand. In a particularly twisted scene, April Aniston’s teddy bear comes to violent life and assaults her. Turns out, it was just a nightmare sequence, but after her boyfriend awakens her, things take a sharp turn worthy of an M. Night Shyamalan flick—the sick sense, indeed. Barely Legal #163: Halloween Special will scare you stiff in the best way. To order, call 800-763-8271 ext. 7651.