in HUSTLER MAGAZINE – February 2010

One day a Jewish girl came home and told her mother she’d fallen in love with an Arab who’d asked her to marry him. The mom had a shit-fit and lambasted her daughter until she mentioned that the Arab was a wealthy sheikh and that they would live in luxury for the rest of their lives. The mom finally gave her consent. Six months later the daughter came home and whined, “All my husband wants to do is fuck my ass day and night, Mom! He never stops! I swear, when we got married, my asshole was the size of a dime. Now it’s the size of a silver dollar!” Her mother quickly retorted, “So for 90 cents you’re gonna make trouble?”


Jake was summoned to the boss’s office, where the guy in charge announced, “I’ve got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?” “Shit!” Jake exclaimed. “I reckon I’ll take the bad news first.” “I’m gonna have to fire you,” the boss snorted. “Go clean out your desk!” “Dammit!” Jake cried. “I had a feeling you’d say that. So what’s the good news?” “You know that hot little redhead in accounting that always wears those real short skirts?” the boss beamed. “She said she’d give me the best blowjob of my life if I gave her your office.”

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